Looking from the outside in, I’m the biggest Scrooge! I hate Christmas music, I don’t like to exchange gifts and I’m not a fan of extended, family visits, and by extended, I mean anything over 24hours. But, if you take the time to see things from the INside out, you will see that I’m not a Scrooge at all, I’m just an INtrovert!*
*See what I did there… INside out… INtrovert. No?
If you’re an introvert and anything like me, chances are the holidays are an extremely stressful time for you! The shopping, crowds, excessive traffic, preparation, constant hype and family visits are all too much, in a short amount of time, and eventually I become thin. Not Kate Moss thin, but thin in energy: nothing left to give. The Christmas music playing EVERYWHERE is just salt in an open wound! By the time New Year’s Eve is over and it’s time to go back to work, I need another vacation.
In the weeks building up to Christmas, I actually become really resentful that I have to spend my hard-earned vacation participating in things that I don’t want to do. I become resentful at being in a relationship because it means that I have to do things I don’t like, more than once! Then the guilt sets in for being such a ungrateful scrooge bitch.
I could be really unfortunate. I could not have a family or not have my boyfriend’s family. I could have no one to care about me, have no kids to share the excitement of Christmas with, have no job to have money for gifts, travel & holiday spirits, so I come to my senses and remember how truly blessed I am. The thought of not having money to buy alcohol, is extremely sobering! I eventually pack my shit and head to stay with my family and his family for beautiful yet ungodly amounts of time!
Having given into the fact that unless I want to be visited by the 3 Ghosts of Christmas and that I must participate in all that is “the holidays,” I have devised a survival guide for introverts to successfully make it out of the holidays, alive and with little or no casualties. May the odds be ever in your favor…
1. Set yourself up for success by limiting the amount of time you visit! Work, traffic and delayed flights are acceptable forms of white lies in this situation! #parentsjustdontunderstand #butBeysuswill #goforthinwhitelies
2. When traveling: headphones in, sunglasses on and no eye contact! The extroverts are dying to tell you who they’re visiting! #nosehablaingles
3. Once you’ve arrived, find fellow introverts and support one another, non-verbally of course! Loud sighs, rolling eyes & shaking your head are all acceptable cues that you too are overwhelmed! #blink2timesforhelp
4. Don’t explain yourself. Extroverts will never understand and you will not only sound self-righteous, but you will also engage them in a debate. No. One. Wants. That. #letjesusbetherighteousone #hesthebdayboyafterall
5. Drink. Heavily. #selfmedicate
6. Take your time getting in & out of bed and in the shower. It’s the perfect, quiet time to recharge. The extroverts just think you’re lazy, can’t handle your alcohol or you have OCD. #lazycrazydrunk
7. Step away for mini breaks! Run a “last-minute” errand, get something from the car or take extra time in the bathroom. #timetodropthekidsoffatthepool
8. Don’t bother with the added stress of last-minute gifts. Give a nice card & a good box of chocolates and make it up on birthdays! #cheapbish
9. Answer questions with brief responses and give short, but sweet, compliments! The extroverts are dying to interview you; get your game-face on! #yes #no #thisisdelicious
10. Get some perspective. When you’re at your wit’s end with the extroverts, remember: spending quality time with family & friends is priceless and as draining as it can be for us introverts, the moments are fleeting & priceless. #costoftheholidays #yoursanity #timewithyourlovedones #priceless
*Bonus Tip: Drink. Heavily. #selfmedicate
Happy Holidays & don’t be naughty like baby Walli! Be nice!